i'm back in the circulation

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sa wakas, nakabalik na rin ako sa sirkulasyon!!! encode encode muna…

i was not able to update my xanga for more than a month..it was just i felt lazy enough to open my blog, think of the things happening in my life, encode them, design the entries up..whew!!! and let us just add the pressure of making papers and reviewing for the exams..anyway, in that one month, a lot of things happened..it's really a "dommage" that i was not able to share all of them to you..

about my academics, i should admit that i am not satisfied with the grades i am getting now..i kept on promising myself that i am going to review and so on and so forth, but i was never able to keep any promise..anyway, i wanna blame the telephone and the unlimited texting for the sudden decline of my grades..before, you would not really see me using the telephone..do you know who taught me to be a telephone addict? who else but gino..for those who do not know this guy, check my previous blog entries and you'll know the history of our friendship..but usually, when we talk over the phone, it would only take us until 1 in the morning..but there.............another man came -- mark..ok ok, i admit it..i do not know mark personally..i just met him in the chatroom sometime last year..while we were chatting i got disconnected, and since i did not have yahoo messenger, i wasn't able to IM him again..i sent him an e-mail saying sorry, i got disconnected..please don't think that i meant to leave you in the chatroom..he sent me offline messages (which i was only able to read when i visited an internet shop)..he gave me the cell number of his sister since he lost his phone..i kept his number for quite sometime until i finally decided to text him..ok.....we became textmates..he asked for our landline number and yes, i gave it to him (but i did not easily give it of course..i first made some interrogations which led to mental torture..hehe)..then he called me, and voila!!! we became instant friends..i don't really wanna say too much things about mark..because hearing his name just makes me frown or make one of my eyebrows rise..grrrrr...mark is an insane guy..he fell for me..i repeat...he fell for me..he fell for me..duh!!! when i realized that i don't wanna be with mark, and that i don't wanna see him, he threatened his own life by suiciding..now, tell me, isn't he insane???

about gino...i really like this man even though i still have not seen him..before, when i hear stories of two people falling in love even though they still haven't seen each other, one word enters my mind -- stupidity!!! for me, it was kinda cheap when you make friends thru text or something like that (constant textmates, chatmates, friendsters, and phonepals)..but seems like my view is already changing..i don't wanna call myself cheap of course..but i still want to call this stupidity....i think i really like him..i think there's even more than "like"..i mean, i think there is "love"..but this can't be..i still have not seen the person..but i talk to thim even more frequently than i talk to my bestfriend or even my closest friend in school..i won't like him if his profile is bad..of course his profile is good..he looks good, too..and i do not think he is a cheap person..now, he wants to meet me na..would it be an act of stupidity if i go see him? would i appear cheap? what if he won't like me in person? what if i won't like the real gino? i am confused about this matter..i have never experienced the "eyeball" thing..

i am going to school tomorrow..i have to check my standing in polsci..of course i did good in the exam, but i do not think that i did as good as i did in our first exam..anyway, let's just hope for the best!!!

ok ok ok...i'll update my xanga as frequently as i can since it's already summer and i do not have lots of things to do..as of now, these encoded above are all i can offer..

je t'embrasse,

jennifer ®

it's really a good thing that tomorrow is a holiday..walang klase!!! the truth is.....i'm kinda tired of going to school already..as i type this blog entry, i'm actually having my headache..

nothing really special has happened in my life these past few days..uhmmm....my "closest friend" (that's how we address each other..i know we violated the rules of grammar) and i shared secrets with each other..i shared nothing but my rejection stories (stories about my crushes rejecting me, and about me rejecting people who like me)..he shared stories about his past relationships, his former crushes..and this story that he shared really shocked me: when he was in his college freshman year (he's a sophomore now), a woman went barenaked in front of him..he did not really give me details about that incident..he was not comfortable of sharing this story especially with a woman like me..but i think it was just for the purpose of seducing my friend that the girl took her clothes off in front of him..grrrr...honestly, when i heard the story, i realized that my friend is such a charming man that girls are willing to go daring just to be noticed by him..uhmmm...i do not know how to say this to him (or i think i just won't tell him about this anymore)...............i like him..not only do i think that i like him, i think i LOVE him..and if he only knows how it hurts me to hear the stories about his chicks..these past few days, we had less talks than we used to have..i think our friendship is already depreciating..ouch!!!

i have no plans of admitting what i feel for him..but....................i wonder.......does he like me too?!? he said before that i am beautiful..he would waste his time every night to talk to me..he already asked me out before..when his sister did not allow him to use the phone (para matawagan ako), he cursed his ate..but.........when i told him about the guy who is courting me, he said.........why don't you give him a chance?!?

when will he ever realize that i like him..i love him..if i tell him about what i really feel, would i ruin our friendship?!?

i opt to stay silent about this..i can already feel that sooner or later, we'll have to part ways already..he may have a girlfriend tomorrow or next week, and i won't know it..he won't share it (i think)..

i don't know..i'm confused..

je t’embrasse,

jennifer 

what a wonderful day!!!

this day has been a very good day for me..

number one: i finally saw my exam result in polsc 14 and i got a good score -- the 5th highest in our class..

number two: my younger sister passed the UPCAT..i dropped by the back of CASAA earlier this morning and checked the list of the UPCAT passers..she passed..she's qualified for DENTISTRY in UP MANILA..yehey!!!

number three: i had my hair straightened today..hehe..

number four: i think i'm in love..hehe again..

je t'embrasse,

jennifer

Reject… Reject… Reject

D

yesterday, my dear friends in manila (they are my high school classmates who now study somewhere in the u-belt) had a mini reunion in the house of joe (also a high school classmate)..they decided to call me since they knew i wouldn't be able to join them (since i am the only one who lives here in QC..medyo malayo kasi)..i was able to talk to almost all of them........including "him" (the one who recently asked for permission to court me)..the daldalan started from about 1 pm and lasted til about 7 pm..but there were also some breaks like the merienda break..

i was able to ask for the advice of joe about "him"..she said that napakaswerte ng magiging girlfriend niya..kasi isang text mo lang diyan, dadating yan agad..di ka iiwan niyan..bla bla bla..seems like i did not hear anything negative about "him" from her..by the way, "he" has a quite long hair, joe said that bagay naman daw sa kanya (but i do not really think so)..

i do not know if i have to share this, but i don't think i want "him" to be my boyfriend..i have to make a very wise choice now since i have never engaged in a relationship ever before..hindi naman sa kung ano pa man, pero he's not the man that i want to introduce to my family and friends..i do not think my family and friends will like him (my high school friends, pwede pa, pero not my iska friends)..and i am not desperate to have a boyfriend, kaya naman hihintayin ko na lang na someone better will come (by the way, "he" studies at the lyceum of the philippines, taking up BSECE)..and besides, i don't think na ka-level ko ang dalawang former girlfriends niya..i mean, ayokong lumabas na mayabang dito, pero i'm just using my brain..

then earlier today, i texted my bestfriend who is also an iska (but in UP baguio)..i asked for some advice, and we both ended up in one decision..ok, i've made up my mind..kesa naman ikahiya ko siya pag naging kami na, masmagandang wag na lang..

pasensiya na, i know i should have not included this story in my blog..it's private and confidential already..it's just for the sake of expressing my feelings that i am willing to expose this story..

je t'embrasse,

jennifer

buwan nga ngayon ng pag-ibig...walang duda

last night, my former classmate (in high school) texted me and asked how my valentine's day went..i proudly said that i did not go out with anybody but my brother and his girlfriend (in short...sumabit ako sa date ng kuya ko and his girlfriend)..he said that malamig din ang valentine's day niya..and when i asked if may dinedeskartehan na siya..ang sabi niya: wala nga eh..ikaw sana..

?!?!?!? i really thought it was a joke so i said: nice joke!!! may iba ka pang jokes diyan? pero hindi daw yun joke eh..hindi ko alam..medyo nashock din ako..

kasi ba naman back in high school, i used to like him very much.......to the extent na tatabihan lang niya ako, gusto ko na siyang halikan..

now i know kung bakit nung niyakap ko siya nung sembreak, hinahalikan niya yung buhok ko..

i still do not know what to tell him..i am not even sure if he is serious with what he said, eh diba nga sa text lang niya sinabi yun..i think i'll have to see him if i am not busy so we can have things settled..

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i've been living here in quezon city for about 10 months and all these times i have been looking for a good-looking guy in the neighborhood..

just earlier, we (the gf of my kuya and i) noticed that one of our neighbors is selling turon, halo-halo, and gulaman..we were hungry then so we decided to drop by that house..then..........we were served by a verrryyy good-looking guy..i think he is just as old as me..he's really cute!!! i thought ate (my kuya's gf) did not appreciate him..but when we were meters away from that house, ate said: grabe, may papa!!! then we started screaming even we were still on the street..when we got home, we screamed more..we even told kuya about the cute guy..buti na lang hindi siya nagselos kasi may bagong crush ang gf niya..

je t’embrasse,

jennifer